Pretty

I’m trying to make my garden look pretty. I’m not sure why. My sisters are coming over, but it is much too late in life to try to impress them. Very few people see my garden. More to the point, I doubt they would care if it were pretty or not.

So why do I want the edging straight? To make it truly pretty, I would need to get a stronger fence, one that isn’t all bent and mushed from me leaning over it, but then I couldn’t lean over it to reach the ground. I could zip tie the edging more tightly to the raggedy fence, but that will make replacing the fencing more difficult if I choose to do so.

I am pleased that it hides the weeds growing on just the other side. I wouldn’t want anyone to know I had weeds in my garden! The weeds are still there, of course, doing their mischievous work. I have not made the effort to root them out or suppress their growth for the winter. But I would like others to think I have. I would like anyone who wanders into my back yard to think that I am industrious and organized and dedicated and marvelous. How ridiculous.

God is not fooled. He sees the garden as it truly is. I doubt anyone else is fooled either. The wavy fence line is visible from here. One small step closer and you’ll see over the edging and notice the weeds.

My attempts to make my garden pretty are not showing the world how marvelous I am. Instead, they are revealing my fear that you will see my imperfections and shun me for them.

My mind tells me that anyone who will shun me is not worthy of being my friend, but at times I am still that middle schooler entering the lunchroom. I want everyone to be impressed with me, to want me to sit at their table, to like my clothes, my hair, my abilities, my friendly and effervescent personality.

God is not fooled. He sees me as I truly am. I doubt anyone else is fooled either, at least not for long. If they look closely or step nearer, they will see my faults.

The odd thing is that I am rarely bothered by the weeds in other people’s gardens. Not everyone is a meticulous housekeeper. Not everyone is always kind and loving. Most people let vanity and pride, irritation and sarcasm grow in their gardens. We all have our weeds.

So, why do I want my garden to look pretty?

Am I now seeking human approval, or God’s approval? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still pleasing people, I would not be a servant of God. Galatians 1:10.

As with most things, my desire to have a pretty garden could be motivated by a desire to share God’s beauty with the world – an array of colorful flowers, the hues of ripe fruit, the luscious green of healthy plants. After all, God creates beauty every day in the shifting ombre shades of a sunrise or sunset, and my little garden can reflect a little of that.

But God sees my motivation as well as what I am showing to the world. He knows if I strive to honor Him or impress others. If I am reading Matthew 7:21-23 correctly, it is not pious actions, even those done in His name, that God seeks, but a relationship with Him.

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for the Lord does not see as mortals see; they look on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7.

And no wobbly garden edging can hide my weeds from God. He sees them all. And He loves me anyway. He loves you anyway. Perhaps I need to let my weeds show and we can all stop pretending we are weed free, and love each other like He loves us, weeds and all.

Love in Christ, Betsy