A Ripe Fig

I’m tired, y’all.

That seems a poor way to start the “school year,” but as I age my year seems more attuned to my garden than to my kids’ activities.

My garden has been put to bed for the fall. Last year the tomato plants survived into September, but not this year. Brown leafless twigs, I pulled them up. My garden is ready for a rest, and so am I.

I have dedicated this year to learning about the publishing industry, especially as it pertains to publishing works of fiction. I have a renewed appreciation for anyone who has navigated this mine field successfully, for someone who has actually been paid to produce their book.

I have met hundreds of authors who have published books I have never heard of and authors who have published thirty, sixty, over one hundred books that I have never read, and I read a lot. Publishers purchase only three percent (three percent!) of the manuscripts they receive. There are also manuscripts that publishers buy but never publish for one reason or another. And yet there are thousands of published books that never cross my line of sight. When I see an author selling her book at a conference, I feel an urge to support them, filling my bookshelves with even more books to read someday.

All this to say that I am eager to return to my old life – card games and gardening, resting, and reading and enjoying meals with my friends.

And like a gentle reminder, I returned from my sixth writers conference this year (ugh!) to find ripe figs in my garden. Just a few. Just enough to let me know that dead as my garden is, God is not done with it yet.

Only one fig is ripe enough to eat today, dark red and soft to the touch. I left the soft pith melt in my mouth as its sweet juice entices my tongue, then enjoy the satisfying crunch of its tiny seeds. Heavenly. A gift. Fruit in a barren garden.

So, here is the question I plan to ponder this fall: When we fail to accomplish whatever goal we have set for ourselves, what is the lesson?

Is the goal unreasonable?

Is the timeline unrealistic?

Are my methods incorrect?

Is my work inadequate?

Do I double down or pivot to something new?

Is this goal in God’s plan or a selfish desire?

All this is because I have drafted a novel and would love to have a publishing house buy it from me, but there is little evidence to indicate that it will happen. The garden looks dead and ready to rest for the winter.

There are ripe figs in this barren land however, sweet moments that remind me that God is not done with me yet. I savor those gifts.

And I cannot begin to thank you for reading this, sharing this, commenting on my posts, and emailing me. Many times, your comments are the sweet figs that keep me going. Thank you.

Finally, as I enter this time of rest and reflection, I am feeding my soul-soil with scripture. Maybe these words from God will speak to your soul as well.

But strive first for the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Matthew 6:33.

Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain; unless the Lord guards the city, the guard keeps watch in vain. Psalm 127:1.

Whatever your task, put yourself into it, as done for the Lord and not for your masters. Colossians 3:23.

May you find a sweet fig in an otherwise barren garden today.

Love in Christ, Betsy