At Home

One of the gifts of aging is an urge to slow down and enjoy the moments of anticipation. So much of my time in my younger years was filled with an eagerness for the future. I couldn’t wait to be sixteen, to be twenty-one, to get married, to have children, to get them out of diapers.

But now, I want it all to slow down. I want to spend more time right now, before the grandkids get older, before the birthdays come, even before my house is full for the holidays. I want to savor these days of cool mornings and warm afternoons. I want a pause before the next big thing.

I understand that cruise passengers often have a day “at sea,” with no outings planned. A day to rest, reflect, and appreciate the ocean. In The Midwife’s Tale, this remarkable woman had days in her diary marked “at home.” One can only presume that she was spending time with her children, taking care of her abode, engaging in the everyday, unremarkable tasks of life. The older I get, the more I appreciate days like that.

We are saturated with things to do, people to see, challenges to face. We want to do everything, and we want to be doing everything right now. I find myself so afraid of missing a wonderful experience that I am missing the joy of rest, reflection, and appreciation.

The pandemic forced us all into days “at home.” The world shuddered at the imposed idleness, unable to cope with the stillness. It was so hard to slow down. Disease made us do that. Disease can still make us do that. Perhaps we should do that voluntarily.

And on the seventh day God finished the work he had done. And he rested on the seventh day from all the work he had done. So, God blessed the seventh day and hollowed it because on it God rested from all the work that he had done in creation. Genesis 2:2-3.

People, being people, took God’s call to have a day of rest to a ridiculous extreme. To this day, devout Hasidic Jews won’t push an elevator button on the sabbath. But we have overreacted in the opposite direction. There are no days of rest in our culture, no days when the stores are closed and people are encouraged to spend a day “at home,” no days when some wonderful experience doesn’t call us away from rest and reflection.

Instead, we must carve out that time for ourselves. Like the garden, we need a space, a small portion of our yard, which is dedicated to growing God’s fruit. I have found myself enlarging that space, just as I am enlarging my garden. I may not grow more, but I think I will grow better.

When I was in my teens, I penned, “Going very fast sometimes, I wonder if I am really moving.” (adolescent angst!) But the sentiment returns when my life gets busy. The restlessness we often sense in our soul may be better satisfied with silence than activity. And while none of us want to return to endless days “at home,” perhaps we would benefit from a regular pattern of them, say one day out of seven.

It’s difficult to do though, in this culture of busy-ness. There is so much to do and so much more that we could be doing. What will people think if I just choose not to take advantage of the opportunities available?

Do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern what is the will of God – what is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2.

That takes time, friend. Spend a day “at home.” Let God renew your mind.

Love in Christ, Betsy